The average couple has sex about once a week, with some couples going at it a little more often. Once every ten days might feel like an eternity to some couples, but a bit speedy for others.
That said, professionals have come to an agreement on what constitutes a sexless relationship. Couples that have sex less than once every two months might want to start taking a closer look at their relationship.
Looking for a dead bedroom fix? Worried about whether your partner still has the spark? Keep reading, and we’ll discuss how to approach the situation.
Is the Dead Bedroom the Cause or the Effect?
Depending on how the rest of your relationship is going, a dead bedroom can be the origin of the problems or the result. Trying to improve your sexual health will look different depending on which problem kicked things off.
Start by thinking back to when problems started. Were you having fantastic sex before stress from another source crept in? Or did you find yourself struggling in bed?
Neither answer is right or wrong. Every dead bedroom is unique. Identifying the relationship problems comes as a first step before addressing them.
Physical Causes of Dead Bedrooms
Sometimes the issue stems from a physical impairment. Erectile dysfunction or vaginal dryness can freeze out a bedroom. All health is sexual health.
More than that, though, many health concerns can damage the libido or sexual function. Issues like diabetes or pre-diabetes, high blood pressure, and medication side effects can lead to a loss of sexual appetite.
For problems like these, you’ll need to get a health professional involved. Even if it’s causing relationship problems, the core treatment will involve getting the issue itself under control.
Poor Communication
Sometimes all you have to do to work through a dead bedroom is talk it out. Your partner may want to try something new or be struggling with an unrelated emotional issue. Either way, you won’t find out without initiating the conversation.
You might be tempted to let things go quietly, but the longer you let it fester, the worse it will get. Small slumps in your sex life can become long-term dead bedrooms if you don’t get it out there.
If neither you nor your partner can communicate well, it might be time to try marriage counseling. A good counselor can help draw the words out of both of you.
Environmental Factors
Sometimes the causes of bed death have more to do with things external to the relationship. You might be tired from carting the kids around or stressed out at work.
To address this type of dead bedroom, you’ll need to make bigger life changes. Discuss your feelings with your partner. You’ll always be better at solving problems together than alone.
Stay Active, Even in the Bedroom
A dead bedroom can feel embarrassing and lonely. It doesn’t have to stay that way, though. Assess your personal health, your communication style, and the rest of your life, and try making some changes.
Looking for ways to improve your love life or get rid of stress? Try checking out our lifestyle section for more articles.
